Can You Hear This?

This is another jewel I received via email. No author or reference was attached. If you read it and know to whom we can give credit for this clever summation of the weather in our great state, please let me know.

YOU KNOW YOU ARE IN SOUTH CAROLINA IN JULY WHEN. . . .
The birds have to use potholders to pull worms out of the ground.
The trees are whistling for the dogs.
The best parking place is determined by shade instead of distance.
Hot water now comes out of both taps.
You can make sun tea instantly.
You learn that a seat belt buckle makes a pretty good branding iron.
The temperature drops below 95 and you feel a little chilly.
You discover that in July it only takes 2 fingers to steer your car.
You discover that you can get sunburned through your car window.
You actually burn your hand opening the car door.
You break into a sweat the instant you step outside at 7:30 a.m.
Your biggest bicycle wreck fear is, “What if I get knocked out and end up lying on the pavement and cook to death?”
You realize that asphalt has a liquid state.
The potatoes cook underground, so all you have to do is pull one out and add butter, salt and pepper.
Farmers are feeding their chickens crushed ice to keep them from
laying boiled eggs.
The cows are giving evaporated milk.

Having read this, if you find that your personal constitution would not bear this type of heat, don’t even think about visitin’ during dog days………….otherwise known as August.